Fight or Flight
Enquiry:
How do I know if my relationship is really worth fighting for?
Advice:
A useful way to think about it is not whether the relationship is hard, but what happens when it's hard. Almost every long-term marriage faces conflict, disappointment, boredom, stress, and periods of disconnection. The question is whether the problems are workable and whether both people are willing to work on…
What's “Baby trapping”?
“Baby trapping” is slang for when someone tries to get pregnant on purpose so they can keep a partner in the relationship or gain control over them.
The idea behind the phrase is usually that the pregnancy is used as a way to:
> keep a partner in the relationship
> force long-term financial or emotional commitment
> gain leverage in a breakup or custody situation
But it’s important to be…
Men Suffer Abuse Too
A lot of people don’t think domestic abuse can happen to men.
You might laugh, but domestic violence towards men is a real thing.
A partner may start by testing the waters to see if they can get away with certain things.
Spitting…
If they get away with that, they might start yelling.
If they get away with that, they might start hitting.
If they get away with that, they might start…
A fully halal, fully segregated community Eid event with dedicated activities for brothers, sisters& children.
📅 Friday 29th May
📍 Old Haberdashers Rugby Club
🕐 1PM – 8PM
🎟️ See poster for ticket prices
This isn’t just for families with children — there’ll also be dedicated brothers & sisters areas with activities, food, sports, chill spaces and more throughout the day.
🔥 Brothers Area Includes:
⚽ Football…
✨ Eid Family Fun Day ✨
A day of eating, drinking, and remembrance.
📅 Friday, 29th May
📍 Old Haberdashers Rugby Club
🕕 1:00 PM – 8:00 PM
🎟️ See poster for entry fees
Book now avoid disappointment 💫
📩 To reserve your place or for more information:
https://www.zeffy.com/en-GB/ticketing/eid-fun-day-3
[Eid Funday Stalls]
Alḥamdulillāh, there will be a limited opportunity to trade at the upcoming Eid Funday through a limited number of stall spaces. All vendors must receive prior approval, as spaces are limited and subject to specific conditions.
▪️ Total stalls available: 10 (5 on each side)
▪️ Conditions & Guidelines:
Fee: £100 per stall
Product variety: Each stall must offer unique products to avoid…
Is a Husband Sinful for Consummating the Marriage Before the Wedding Ceremony?
Question:
A man concluded the marriage contract with a woman (nikah), but the marriage was not yet publicly announced. Then he consummated the marriage with his wife. Is he sinful? Some common people say that the prescribed punishment (ḥadd) must be carried out on him because he violated the customs of the country (Yemen). Is this…
Transgenderism in Islam
Question:
What is the Islamic ruling on transgenderism?
Shaykh Abdul-Hameed Az-Zoukory hafidhahullah
The woman is a woman, and the man is a man. Everyone must know this.
A man cannot become a woman, and a woman cannot become a man even if they undergo surgeries involving gender change from woman to man or from man to woman.
According to the (ruling) of Allah and the legislation of…
Marital Green Flags
Question:
What qualities should one look for in a potential partner?
Answer:
Marry someone who is L.O.Y.A.L.
L — Lowers the gaze and guards modesty
O — Obedient to Allah
Y — Yearns for Jannah and growth in deen
A — Amanah — trustworthy, honest, and dependable
L — Loving through thick and thin
Source: https://t.me/Menzbenefits/415
And You Wonder Why Your Du'as Are Not Accepted
Question:
Some spouses who live in Denmark and some other western countries annul their contracts of their marriage at the Civil Office claiming irreconcilable differences with each other, though in truth there are no problems in the marriage. They only do so to get social support of a higher value, albeit they are not in need of such an increase. Is this permissible?…
Marital Red Flags
Question:
What traits should one avoid in a potential partner.
Answer:
Avoid a D.I.S.L.O.Y.A.L. person.
D — Deceitful
Habitually dishonest, manipulative, or hiding important truths.
I — Immodest
Lacking ḥayā’ (modesty/shame before Allah) in speech, dress, or conduct.
S — Spiteful
Constantly harsh, vindictive, insulting, or nurturing resentment.
L — Loose-tongued
Constant gossip,…
Al-Allamah As-Sa'di (may Allah Almighty have mercy on him) said: "Meaning: Allah legislated the waiting period and established divorce within it for great wisdoms. Among them: that perhaps Allah may c
I say: Observing these meanings regarding the mentioned dislike before divorce is more appropriate and fitting.
Ibn Al-Arabi said in the interpretation of Allah Almighty's saying: "For if you dislike them, perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good" : "The meaning is: If a man finds in his wife dislike, aversion, or repulsion, without any lewdness or disobedience, let him be patient with her harm…
Al-Albani mentioned two supporting witnesses from the hadiths of Ibn Abbas and Ibn Amr (may Allah be pleased with them), and also mentioned it elsewhere in "As-Sahihah" (no. 2678) from the hadith of A
The Twelfth Aspect: This type of divorce is not fairness from the self nor justice toward the wife's relatives. Just as the husband would not like this for his own female relative—his sister, daughter, aunt, maternal aunt, or other women of his kin—he should not like it for other Muslim women. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself."…
He (peace be upon him) also said in his sermon during the Farewell Pilgrimage—as in Sahih Muslim (no. 1218) from the hadith of Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him): "Fear Allah concerning women, for
He (peace be upon him) also said: "O Allah, I declare as sacred the rights of two weak ones: the orphan and the woman." Narrated by Ahmad (no. 9666) and Ibn Majah (no. 3678), authenticated by Ibn Hibban (no. 5565) and Al-Hakim (nos. 211, 7167) with Adh-Dhahabi agreeing, and Al-Albani graded its chain as hasan in "As-Sahihah" (no. 1015).
The Eighth Aspect: Divorcing a woman without reason or need is an instigation…
Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said—as in "Majmu' Al-Fatawa" (vol. 32, p. 293): "The original ruling on divorce is prohibition; it is only permitted to the extent of need.
The Fourth Aspect: What Al-Bazzar (no. 3066) and At-Tabarani in "Al-Awsat" (no. 7848) narrated from Abu Musa Al-Ash'ari (may Allah be pleased with him): The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "Do not divorce women without a valid reason, for Allah Almighty does not like those who 'taste' frequently (i.e., men who frequently marry and divorce) nor those who 'taste' frequently (women who do the same)."
Its…
I'm Not Feeling Her Anymore. Can I Just Divorce Her?
Question:
If a man divorces his wife for no reason whatsoever, except that he does not feel at ease with her, is he being unjust to her?
Sheikh Najeeb Ash-Shar'abi:
Regarding a man divorcing his wife without reason or need, there are two views among the scholars:
The first: that it is disliked. This is the view of the majority of scholars.
The second: that it…
With less than 10 days left until the Eid Fun Day [https://t.me/Menzbenefits/403], isn’t it about time you got rid of that belly?
Don't stress! There’s still time to make a difference — but you’ve got to take action now!
Tips for Weight Loss
1⃣. Eat in moderation.
Fill one-third of your stomach with food, one-third with water, and leave one-third empty for easy breathing.
2⃣. Avoid:
Sugar and foods made with…
A fully halal, fully segregated community Eid event with dedicated activities for brothers, sisters& children.
📅 Friday 29th May
📍 Old Haberdashers Rugby Club
🕐 1PM – 8PM
🎟️ See poster for ticket prices
This isn’t just for families with children — there’ll also be dedicated brothers & sisters areas with activities, food, sports, chill spaces and more throughout the day.
🔥 Brothers Area Includes:
⚽ Football…
The waiting Period for Men
Unlike women, men do not have a waiting period (’Iddah). They can remarry straight away! However, there are three cases (as far as I know) where a man has to undergo the same waiting period as his divorced wife before being allowed to remarry.
Before we mention the 3 cases it's important to note that divorce is of two types:
1. Ṭalāq Raj’ee (revocable divorce) - this is where the…
It is rare for a person to remain the same as when you first knew them. Hearts change, feelings grow cold, and the affection that once felt sincere slowly fades.
It is as if companionship in these times has become like a currency whose value keeps changing; it shifts with personal interest, weakens at the first mistake, and disappears at the first disagreement.
Where are the hearts that used to forgive mistakes, be…
