𝗪𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻'𝘀 𝗕𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗳𝗶𝘁𝘀 (71)

Don't fall prey to predators Dear sisters, especially those of you who are young teenagers. Please be cautious and don’t fall into the traps of men your age (and even older) who make promises of coming for your hand later. Those who speak to you in private, who talk to you in every way except through your father. They may even come and try to get you to abandon your family and do Nikāh with them in secret, with his best friend as your Wali. Don’t be so naive as to throw away your honor and your chastity like it’s nothing. These men will drop you faster than a hot potato once they get bored or see that it’s time to actually make things real and serious. It’s unfortunate that many sisters grow up in situations where they have no examples of normal marriages, or practicing people around them, so they easily are swept off their feet by any man who comes to them with false promises of love and protection and being “on the Manhaj”. We have some sisters who consider themselves engaged to men who haven’t even spoken a word to their fathers yet. These men reach out to sisters via their friends, social media, mutual contacts, and have an entire situation going on and promising marriage and getting her wrapped around their finger, while she is naive and emotional enough to believe it’s serious. Women need to acknowledge their weak hearts and emotional nature and understand that allowing anyone near their hearts for even mere weeks can result in infatuation and pain that lasts years and gets them nowhere. Some women even get hung up on mere proposals for years, despite them never having gone further than an idea. Men move on much faster and more realistically. Most women don’t. This is obviously because practicing sisters have little to no contact or interaction with men, so any hint of interest beguiles them and leaves them enamored. Your Mahārim and Wali are a shield for you from the harms that men are capable of inflicting upon you — physically and emotionally. Don’t throw away their protection for a mere glance cast your way or an empty promise (any promise not made to your father is futile). Your house has a front door and an owner (your father). Let any man interested in you walk through that door and discuss with the one who guards you before you even allow yourself to have any attachment. One who neglects this advice will ruin herself and lay waste her heart. How many situations we’ve seen that cause intense pain to our hearts, yet at the same time leave us in anger over the naivety and delusion of sisters who should know better. ➡️Forwarded