A Piece of Advice for Women

Some of you believe that your prayer, fasting, night worship, and recitation of the Qur'ān are all that bring you closer to Allāh, and that performing these acts of worship is everything. My dear sister, you have overlooked obedience to your husband—yes, your husband. He is either your Paradise or your Hellfire. Obedience to one’s husband is an obligation upon you, so where do you stand regarding this duty? Know that Allāh will not accept these acts of worship from you unless your husband is pleased with you(*). Where are you with respect to the saying of the Messenger of Allāh ﷺ: “If I were to command anyone to prostrate to other than Allāh, I would have commanded a wife to prostrate to her husband.” Reflect deeply upon this ḥadīth and understand it well. Ask yourself: are you fulfilling the rights of your husband? And know that the right of the husband is not limited to raising the children, helping them with their studies, or preparing some food only. Obedience to the husband means lowering your voice in his presence, being available to him whenever he needs you, appearing before him in your best appearance, and safeguarding his home. As Allāh says: “So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband’s] absence what Allāh has entrusted them to guard.” The devoutly obedient are those who obey—so do you obey your husband? The Prophet ﷺ said: “A woman will not taste the sweetness of Ēmān until she fulfills the right of her husband.” Reevaluate yourself for the sake of preserving your home and your husband, if you truly desire proper obedience to Allāh. ______ (*) on the authority of Abū Umāmah (may Allāh be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allāh ﷺ said: “There are three whose prayers do not rise beyond their ears: a runaway slave until he returns; a woman who spends the night while her husband is displeased with her; and a leader of people who leads them while they resent him.” [At-Tirmidhī; graded ḥasan by Sheikh Al-Albāni]